


All That Remains

by hipsterpepe



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, F/F, F/M, M/M, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Yea its another dumb reincarnation au im so fucking original, eremin is the main pairing but theres other side shit so yea, like super duper slow burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-19
Updated: 2016-08-08
Packaged: 2018-05-15 01:23:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5766547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hipsterpepe/pseuds/hipsterpepe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Do you ever get the feeling that your place in the world should have ended long ago? Like you’re stuck in the wrong time, or the wrong place, or both. Like you’re passing people on the street you were never meant to exist beside. Like you’re some sort of glitch in the matrix. Like you’ve been places and met people before that you know you’ve never seen in this lifetime. My name is Armin Arlert and I don’t think I belong here."</p>
<p>Here's another dumb reincarnation au no one asked for.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. In which Armin is just a little fed up with his job.

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first fanfiction I've written since I was like fifteen. That was five years ago. Please be gentle with me senpai. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

It’s a bit strange how life can throw literal shit at you and somehow you are expected to smile and persevere. Honestly it’s a tall order in my humble opinion, but somehow I seem to manage it. Like now, as a bag of popcorn sails over the counter and I am covered in kernels and salt. “I wanted _extra_ butter,” “And I’m sorry ma’am but I told you three separate times that our oil is regulated via machine and it’s against our health code to provide any more than what is regulated,” I stand as tall as I can make myself, which isn’t very intimidating with all of my five feet and three inches- four on a good day.

The lady- who looked head to toe like she’d never worked a day in her life but expected to be treated like she owned the place- scoffed and crossed her arms, “I’d like to speak to the manager,” It was only with mild smugness that I put on my brightest smile and tilted my head, “You’re looking at him.” The woman’s face lit up like the hot sign at Krispy Kreme and I could practically feel the embarrassment roll off her in waves. She said nothing more and stomped away to join the rest of her family waiting outside one of the theaters for that particular showing to end so they could get in.

“Wow Arm that was stone-fucking-cold. Did you see the look on her face? Fucking priceless!” I looked over to see the source of the voice rounding the counter and slipping in to place behind it. I turn and cross my arms, jutting out a hip, “Eren, where on earth have you been? Mina left an hour ago and you were supposed to cover while I took inventory. Please tell me you didn’t sneak into a showing again.” The infuriatingly sheepish grin and his ears turning red were all I needed to confirm my suspicions. “Eren, Shadis is going to have both our asses if he finds out. I can’t keep covering for you like we’re back in high school lit class and you’re sneaking off to get lit in the bathroom.”

“Oh come on Armin it’s never busy in here and that was once-“  


“ _-A week_ , Eren, once a week every week for an entire semester,” I sighed and shook my head, “Just take over the till so I can go do my job.” I start toward the door to the stock room but the brunette grabs my elbow and leans in, his breath against my ear, “Come on Arm, don’t be like that. Look I’m sorry, you know how bored I get here. I’ll make it up to you okay? I’ll buy you a coffee next time we go to Maria’s together.” I flush at the wisp of hot breath on my neck and his imploring tone of voice and I frown, staring him down pointedly, “Eren you never go with me to Maria’s Book Store. You tell me it’s too quiet and too hipster for you,” “Okay point taken. I’ll find a way to pay you back though. I’m sorry okay?” He puts his hands on my cheeks and uses his thumbs to push my frown up into a smile, “Please don’t stay mad at me, I can’t take my best friend glaring into my soul like this. Plus your face is too pretty to be all droopy and pinched.” I push him off and go through the door before he can see me redden and the stupid grin I can feel stretching across my face.

Eren Jaeger and I have been friends for what seems like forever. We grew up across the street from each other along with our other friend Mikasa who lived two doors down. Mrs. Jaeger often comments that our first time meeting seemed like three very old friends being reunited after a long absence and that tends to stick with me a lot for some reason.

If I am quiet and reserved that would make Mikasa Ackerman positively mute. Mika comes off cold to most people but me and Eren know how caring and compassionate she really is. She was the valedictorian of our senior class- though I put up quite the fight and was her salutatorian- and captain of the women’s volley ball team. And a ballerina. And a gymnast. And a black belt. Mikasa Ackerman is practically perfect in every way possible and honestly we would probably have very little in common besides grades if it wasn’t for Eren, the glue that holds us all together.

Eren was always the type of kid to make his mother worry. Running off into the woods to collect critters- and dragging me along to catalog them. Having house parties in high school when Doctor and Mrs. Jaeger were away for the weekend. Getting a tattoo despite his parent’s reservations about them when he turned eighteen. Eren Jaeger loved life and he wanted everyone else to love it too. His smile was infectious and he was too charming for his own good and somewhere along the lines I may have kind of… sort of… fallen in love with him for it. Just a little bit. He doesn’t know, but Mikasa does and she’s threatened more than once to whack me upside the head if I didn’t just get on with it and say something. But I can’t do that, it goes against everything friendship stands for and I’m a wimp who fears rejection and he’s way out of my league. Eren doesn’t discriminate between men and women and everything in between. He says it’s all the same to him and as a result has dated most of our friends or at least slept with them. Being the best friend, I get to hear each and every little detail Eren wishes to divulge of his escapades and let me tell you, I’ve become quite good at tuning people out. It’s just necessary for my sanity.

I pick up my clipboard and start taking inventory of the stock before going to leave a note pinned to the cork board for Shadis with the list of things we need ordered this week. I frown at the amount of candy that needs ordering. Each week more and more goes missing despite no one buying it. I made a mental note to have a word with Sasha before Shadis catches on. I sighed and checked the time on my phone. Marco, the other assistant manager would be here in about an hour to relieve me and I had nothing else to do for the time being so I leaned against the shelves of salt and butter and brought up the Kindle app on my phone. I immersed myself in the text and the next thing I knew, I caught sight of a large shadow looming over my shoulder and jerked, letting out the least manly scream the world has ever witnessed as my phone clattered to the floor. “Jesus Christ, Eren, could you not?” I glare and hold a hand up to my chest, attempting to calm myself down as he doubles over in laughter. I grab one of the loose popcorn bags from the package on the shelf and whack him with it, “You are awful, I don’t know why we’re friends.” He finally managed to calm down enough to speak and rubbed tears from his eyes, “Where the fuck do you go when you space out like that? I called your name like six times,” I frowned, picking up my phone and inspecting it for damage, “I don’t know what you’re talking about, I didn’t hear you.” “Yea obviously. Don’t worry about it, look Marco and Thomas are here to take over for us, let’s go grab a bite and I’ll take you home okay?” I arched a brow and checked the time. An hour had passed, “Alright. Go clock out, I’ll meet you outside after I talk to Marco.” He flashed me a blinding smile and nodded before heading to the main office. I sighed, watching him go before leaving the stock room and going to meet Marco out front.

The freckled man was leaning against the counter and talking to someone I didn’t immediately recognize while Thomas Wagner, another of our cashiers served customers on the other end of the counter. I approached Marco and offered him a smile, “Hey Marco, I already took stock and filled out the order but if you want to double check behind me I’d really appreciate it,” “Oh sure no problem Armin, I’ll do that for you. How did the candy stock look this week?” I let out a sigh and push my bangs back from my eyes to convey my exasperation, “I’m going to have a talk with Sasha next time we work together. She can’t keep sneaking food and not expect to have repercussions,” “Sasha? Sasha Braus? Man is she still pigging out every five minutes?” The chuckle and added voice make me shoot my gaze over to the other figure beside the counter and my eyes widen. Marco grins and some of his freckles disappear into the lines around his eyes and into his dimples, “Armin, do you remember-…”

“Jean. Of course, it’s good to see you. I thought you moved abroad. What brings you back here?” Jean Kirshtein was one of those people you just couldn’t forget. Charming and a little bit of a snob, a nice face and a fat wallet. He and Eren were always at each other’s throats growing up and Eren’s injuries had definitely become less frequent after Jean moved to France in our sophomore year of high school. I decide at once to not let him know Eren is here too and pray that the brunette is already in the car lest there be a reunion brawl in the lobby.  


Jean tilts his head and leans forward over the counter, “Well if it isn’t little Armin Arlert. Yea Pop’s company is done expanding over there so we came back over. I’m here to stay this time though. They wanna drag me along for another move they’ll need to go ahead and give me my inheritance,” I let out a nervous chuckle while Marco lets out a less than attractive snort. “You and ‘Kasa still following that chump around like lost puppies?” I cross my arms and cock a hip out, “Eren isn’t a chump, Jean.” He snorts, running a hand through the messy top of his undercut, “That says it all huh?” I don’t miss the way his eyes trail me from head to toe once, then twice, and I suddenly feel very self-conscious, “What a shame.” I dare not think of the implications behind the odd exchange we just had and abruptly turn back to Marco who seems completely oblivious to everything that just happened, “Have a good night Marco, and enjoy your day off tomorrow.” “Thanks Armin, have a good one.” I turn and leave to go clock out.

After I grab my bag and jacket from the lockers in the back I make my way to the lobby again and am about to push through the door when that voice hits me again, “Hey Arlert! Homecoming party this Friday at my place. Getting a bunch of people together. Connie, Sasha, and the gang. You should come. Bring ‘Kasa. Hell, even bring Jaeger but put him on a leash and maybe muzzle him.” I blink and find myself slowly nodding, “Umm… alright. Friday night. Have Marco text me the details.” He smirked at me and I swear my heart skipped a beat. I swallowed thickly as he said, “Sure thing. Can’t wait to see you.” I nodded once more and quickly left to meet Eren at his car.

  
.:.:.  


It wasn’t until we were driving down the street to the house where I lived with my parents and grandfather that I brought up the party to Eren.

“Umm... So guess who’s back in town.” I heard him make a grunt for me to continue, “Jean Kirshtein,” the car seized as he slammed on breaks, making me cough from the seat belt nearly choking me to death, “Jesus Christ, Eren!” He murmured apologies and reached over to check me for damage before proceeding back down the street at a much more leisurely pace, “So Jeanbo Kirshtneigh is back huh?” I nodded and continued, “He uh. He invited me to his party on Friday. And you and Mikasa too,” I decided to leave out the part about the leash and muzzle. Eren let out a “Tch” and shook his head, “Already trying to get in Mika’s panties again huh? Fucking horse face.” I hold my tongue again, because sometimes it’s just easier to let Eren think things. Everyone else knew that Jean and Mikasa had banged in freshman year but Eren seemed to still be in deep denial. After a minute I piped up, “So will you come to the party?” “Of course, I gotta give ol’ Horse Face a warm welcome home.” I frown deeply as Eren pulls into the drive way of my tiny house. “Eren please don’t cause any trouble. We’re not in high school anymore, if you throw a punch at Jean he can press charges,” My imploring tone of voice must have hit a nerve somewhere in his thick skull because the next thing I knew he was putting his car in park and turning to me in the seat, “I know, I know, I’m sorry. I promise I’ll try not to start anything. But if he starts something…” I sigh and shake my head, “I’ll bring the first aid kit and stash it in your trunk.” Even in the barely there moonlight I can see his viridian eyes sparkle and his grin takes something in my gut and twists as he reaches up to boop my nose with a “You’re the best, Arm.” I scrunch it but can’t help letting out a giggle. “Yea yea…”

We sit in silence for a few minutes, letting the purr of Eren’s precious corvette fill the silence until the owner seemed fed up with it, “Have you told them yet?”  
I swallow thickly. My answering silence gives him reason to sigh and ruffle his hair, “Armin you gotta tell them sooner rather than later. We’ll be done with our last semester soon. We can’t wait around for this. ‘Kasa and I have been going every other weekend down there to look at the apartments. You can’t stay here and coddle them all your life. It’s time for you to do something for yourself.” I nod in understanding, “I... Eren I know… believe me no one wants to move to the shore more than I do but… what will they do when I’m gone? I mean mom and dad can take care of themselves but gramps…” I sighed, tilting my head back to look at the roof of the car, “My extra income is really helpful to them.” Eren drummed his thumbs against the steering wheel, “It’s not just that though is it? You’re still having the dreams aren’t you?” I look away from him and nod. After a beat I feel Eren lay his hand over mine on the center console and a tingle shoots up my arm, “Armin it’s just a dream. Nothing is going to happen to them, I promise. They don’t need you to protect them.” I swallow around the lump in my throat and nod again. “Y-Yea. I know. I’m sorry. I’ll tell them soon okay? Just not yet.” He nods in understanding and retracts his hand. I already miss the contact but force my fingers to move and undo my seat belt before opening the door. I grab my things and get out before leaning back in, “Text me and let me know you got home safe, okay?” Eren rolls his eyes and sighs, “Yes, _Mom_.” I shake my head and let the door slam, watching as he peels out of my driveway and speeds off down the street.

Maybe I won’t have a dream tonight.


	2. In Which Armin Finds Himself With Unexpected Company

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to my dear friend Maddi, whose ecstatic reactions to the story so far have made my fucking year. <3  
> Go check her out on tumblr @humanitys-heichou

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also a huge whopping thank you to the amazing and wonderful Katy who has so graciously offered to beta for me.  
> Visit her blog on tumblr @the-lady-of-lothlorien

A blinding white light, fire, and crumbling brick raining down everywhere. People screaming, people running, people dying. Blood, limbs, and gore. A lot of my dreams started like this. Which one will it split off into tonight?

This time I’m sailing through the air, Eren ahead of me, and suddenly something closes around me. A maw, hot and thick with the stench of decay and everything is too much. I’m screaming, though I can’t hear myself, and then suddenly it’s Eren who is sliding down the beast’s throat. I’m helpless, so helpless on the roof. Why can’t any one hear me? Why doesn’t anyone help? Eren- _Eren!_

I wake up in a cold sweat, my hair practically plastered to my face and neck. I sit up, pulling the damp locks up into a loose bun at the back of my head as I try to calm down.

I’ve seen this one before, too many times.

I lean over to snatch my phone from the bedside table, nearly dropping it thanks to the incessant shaking in my hands. I squint at the display and sigh. 

Three in the morning and I have a long history together.

I stretch out my stiff neck and get up, tiptoeing to the bathroom across the hall. I close the door and turn on the light, using water from the faucet to clean my face. When I look up at the mirror I frown at the dark bruises under my eyes. Maybe Mikasa will let me borrow some concealer or something for the party Friday night.

I blink, tilting my head at my reflection. We both look equally confused. I don’t normally make a fuss about my appearance, but I have the sudden inexplicable urge to impress Jean. Now there’s a new notion.

I try not to think of what Eren would say about that if he knew. I snort and shake my head before lumbering back to my room. I look at my phone again, tempted to text Eren just for the sake of having something to do. I know he’s probably up playing League. I think about the dream I just had and wince, pinching the bridge of my nose. I pick up a book instead and curl up on the seat by my window to read in the dim light from the streetlamps.

.::.

I didn’t mention the dream at all to Eren at work that day. I knew exactly what he’d say. _It’s just a dream, Armin, I’m right here._ Altogether quite unhelpful. I did text Mikasa about it though. She’s had similar dreams before, oddly enough, and her reassurance and understanding was far more relieving than anything Eren could offer me. Eren wasn’t plagued with nightmares like Mikasa and I seemed to be.

It was around seven that night at the theatre when Jean Kirshtein showed up. It had been a pretty slow night, so I’d already sent both Eren and Mina home. I was wiping down the counter when he sauntered up and leaned on it with a “Hey.” I blinked and looked up, arching a brow.

“Evening, Jean. Marco’s not here, it’s his day off.”

“I’m not here to see Marco.”

I tilt my head, “Oh. Are you here to catch a movie?”

“Nope. I’m here to keep the pretty blonde popcorn boy company if he lets me.”

I feel heat rise to my cheeks, “I uh. Oh. Well, alright then.” I drop my rag and cross my arms, sticking my nose into the air, “And it’s popcorn _manager_ , thank you very much.”

Jean snorts and props his elbow up on the counter, chin resting his hand, “Ah, yes. Forgive my insolence, oh great and powerful popcorn manager.”

I roll my eyes, but can’t shake the smile from my face. “Did you really come all the way here just to pester me?” I knew the upscale side of town was a bit far out from here. Not that anyone who lived on that side of town needed to worry about gas money.

“Marco told me you guys don’t get much business on Wednesdays, so I figured I’d pop over to entertain you for a bit.”

I move over to refill the soda cup dispensers, turning my back to Jean, “Really? How thoughtful of you,” 

It comes out a bit more sarcastic then I intend it to, but I don’t have time to dwell on it before he says, “I may also be here because I think you’re hot and want to get to know you better.”

I jerk and drop everything, cursing under my breath as I bend over to pick them up. Behind me I hear Jean whistle.

“I don’t know what’s hotter, hearing goody-two-shoes Armin Arlert cuss or the view I’m getting right now.”

I blush and quickly stand up, turning to shoot him a glare, “I didn’t think you were into guys.”

He gave me a lazy grin, “I didn’t either until this cute French boy showed me this neat thing he could do with his tongue. Maybe I could show you sometime?”

The heat in my cheeks only intensified. I was clearly unused to being flirted with so blatantly. I turned back to my job, shaking my head, “You’re incorrigible.”

He chuckles and companionable silence settles between us for a few minutes. 

“So, are you coming to the party?”

I look back over my shoulder at him and find that his flirtatious smirk has morphed into an almost childish look of hope and I feel my heart skip a beat. “Um, y-yeah we’re coming. All three of us.”

“Good, I’m glad. Though, I hope for his sake that Jaeger keeps his trap shut all night.”

I frown and turn back around fully, putting my hands on my hips and narrowing my eyes, “Look, I’ve already asked Eren to be on his best behavior, but I’ll tell you right now, Jean, if you start a fight with Eren I can’t be held responsible for what he or _I_ do to you.”

Jean snorts and I step up to the counter, leaning over and into his space. I grab his chin forcefully and drag him closer, glaring. I feel his breath on my lips as I lower my voice dangerously, “Don’t fuck with Eren.”

I back up and smirk as I watch him grapple for words, clearly flustered, though it doesn’t look like I’d really intimidated him as much as given him some sort of weird boner. I can’t help but snicker in satisfaction as I skip off to the stockroom for a few minutes to let him collect himself.

As the night wears on I ask Jean about France and he asks me about college. Conversation between us comes astoundingly easy and comfortably and I find myself enjoying his company. Not that Jean ever truly came off as the asshole Eren thinks him to be. They were really both only awful assholes to each other. I guess I just expected him to be more of a snob because of his wealth. I’m suddenly reminded of a lesson learned by one Miss Elizabeth Bennet: Don’t judge a man by his money. 

The next time I look at the clock on the wall it’s past time for me to close up the concession stand and I curse. 

“I’m gonna miss the bus…” I bite my thumb and tap my foot but my nerves are quickly quelled.

“No problem blondie, I’ll give you a ride.”

I turn and peer at him hopefully, “Really? You wouldn’t mind?”

He shakes his head, shoving his hands in his pockets, “Nah it’s not a big deal. Can’t let you walk home, now can I? Jaeger would kill me,” I let out a deep sigh of relief, “On the condition that you have a coffee with me tomorrow.”

I blink and look at him, my brows furrowing. “A coffee? You want to have a coffee with me?”

He nods, smirking slightly.

“Um. Alright then. I get out of my last class at two if you wanna pick me up from the college.”

“Sounds good.” he grinned.

I hesitated, watching him for a few awkward moments before going to clock out and grab my stuff.

.::.

I felt very out of place in Jean’s pristine black Jaguar. I kept sliding on the expensive leather interior, causing the seatbelt to chafe my neck. I’d given him my address when we left and he’d programmed it into his GPS, so now I sat in silence while he sang along to an Arctic Monkeys’ song that played from the impressive speaker system. I was surprised to find that his voice wasn’t bad. In fact I was so impressed by his vibrato on the second verse that I became a bit entranced, closing my eyes and taking in the sensual rhythm coupled with his rich voice.

 _“So have you got the guts?_  
_Been wondering if your heart's still open and_  
_If so I wanna know what time it shuts_  
_Simmer down and pucker up_  
_I'm sorry to interrupt it's just I'm constantly_  
_On the cusp of trying to kiss you_  
_I don't know if you feel the same as I do_  
_But we could be together, if you wanted to”_

Before I knew it we’d arrived at my house, and I had the good graces to blush when Jean tried to shake me awake. I hadn’t been asleep, of course, just content to listen and lose myself in the music.

“Thanks for bringing me home Jean,” I smiled, my hand on the door handle.

Jean grinned back, “No problem, blondie. Two o’clock tomorrow?” he prompted, arching a sculpted brow,

“Two o’clock tomorrow.” I affirmed.

It was suddenly then that leaned across me, his face coming within inches of mine and I stopped breathing.

I’d never really noticed before, but Jean was quite handsome. He still had the same shaggy, sandy hair that fell slightly over his forehead, shaved into an undercut like it had been in high school, and darker at the roots. I recalled thirteen year old Eren teasing Jean for bleaching it, but I was positive that it was his natural color. I can’t say exactly why I was so sure, maybe just intuition because it looks much softer than it would be had he continued to bleach it over the years. His hazel eyes were narrow and framed by dark lashes. He had a strong jaw, angular chin, and full lips, and I had no idea where Eren had gotten the notion of a horse face from because, honestly, I couldn’t find one unappealing feature. I also note that out of all the colognes Jean could be wearing, it wasn’t Serge Luten’s or Clive Christian, but _Chocolate Axe _that flooded my senses at his close proximity.__

I glanced back at his lips and found myself wondering if he tasted as good as he smelled, and my own mouth was suddenly dry. I flicked my tongue out to wet my lips and that’s when Jean pulls up the lock on the door and moves back into his place in the driver’s seat, a smirk on his lips, “Sorry, lock gets stuck sometimes and I have to do it manually.”

I swallow thickly and finally manage to take a breath, simply nodding because I don’t trust my voice quite yet. I grab my jacket after undoing my seat belt, opening the door then to let in the chill night air.

“Um alright. Well goodnight Jean, thanks again. It was fun.”

“Night. Tell your folks I said ‘Hi’.”

I nod and exit the car, closing the door gently. I drag my feet up the steps to the door, turning back to look at him through the windshield. He winks at me and wiggles his fingers in an odd little wave. I throw up a hand in return, sending him a sheepish grin before I go inside.

After having leftovers for dinner that night, I add _“Do I Wanna Know?” _by the Arctic Monkeys to my playlist, and even though it isn’t quite the same without Jean’s additional vocals, the hypnotic melody lulls me to sleep anyway.__

I have a new dream that night. 


	3. In Which Armin Has a Coffee Date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for this being so late. Between deaths in the family and having to rewrite it after Word decided to be a giant fuckbutt and delete it, it's a wonder it even exists. But here you go. And yes, I know it looks like this is a jearmin story. It will look like that for... well a while. Don't worry eremin fans, just be patient. Also there's ereri in this chapter if you squint really hard but don't worry that's not gonna be a thing.

This dream was different in the sense that it didn’t leave me quaking or crying or sweating. It was different in that it was… comforting. I was atop a giant wall, gazing out to the setting sun, and Jean was there beside me. We were talking, though I don’t remember what we spoke about, just that it was an easy thing- this comradery between us.

And that was it.

I woke to my alarm for what must have been the first time in months, as I was usually already awake and ready to silence it. I felt far more rested than I had in a long time, and it lifted my mood so much that Gramps asked me if I was feeling alright when I skipped down stairs for breakfast.

.::.

I went to my classes that day more focused than ever. It’s amazing what you can accomplish on a good night’s sleep, huh? My last class of the day was European History, a class I had with Eren.

You would think it would be great. Having my best friend whom I was more than a bit smitten with sit next to me in the back of the class had seemed wonderful at first, but had quickly become rather depressing. In all the other classes we had shared in our lives, I always had to make Eren stop pestering me so I could actually learn something. Now, I longed for those days again as Eren stared dreamily at our rather short and grumpy professor. Eren had never done exceptionally well in school until this class. In this class, Eren’s grades were on par with mine, all because he yearned to impress Professor Ackerman. My envy at this adoration was palpable, though Eren, of course, was oblivious.

As Professor Ackerman dismissed the class, Eren’s trance was broken and he turned around in his seat to face me. “Wanna hit up the burger joint for lunch?”

I was tempted to say yes at the sight of his hopeful grin, but alas, I had plans.

“Sorry Eren, Jean asked me out to coffee. He’s picking me up from here.” I looked down to my desk as I packed away my books, but not before catching the look of pure disbelief that spread across Eren’s face.

“You’re going out on a date? With _Jean Kirschtein_ of all people?”

“It’s _not_ a da-” I was suddenly struck silent.

_Was it a date?_

“Oi, Jaeger!” Professor Ackerman’s voice shook me from my thoughts and both Eren and I turned to look at him, leaning on his desk. “Help me carry all of this shit back to my office, will you?”

Eren’s face lit up and he bounded down the rows of desks before coming to an abrupt stop in front of him, giving a salute. “Aye-Aye, Captain!” he responded jovially, all smiles, but I couldn’t help but notice the professor’s normally stoic face pinch up into a look of concern.

I shrugged it off, turning without another word to Eren –because honestly there was no getting through to him when the professor was involved- and pushing through the back exit which led me to the path near the parking lot. I sighed, shifting my bag on my shoulder and trying to keep the sour expression from my face. This wasn’t anything new, the weird teacher’s pet thing Eren and Professor Ackerman had going on, and I was almost positive that it didn’t go any further than Eren occasionally running errands and grading papers for the older man, but it still made me insanely jealous.

My scowl melted as soon I reached the parking lot and saw Jean, who was leaning against the side of his Jag. His arms were crossed over his chest and his sleeves were pushed up to his elbows.

Fuck my fetish for toned forearms.

My eyes traveled the length of his arms, up over his shoulders, and landed on his face, where he was peering at me over his Ray Ban’s with a smirk. I stopped in front of him and cleared my throat, shifting my bag again.

“Um. Hey Jean.”

“Hey Blondie, you ready to go?”

I scrunched my nose at the nickname and nodded. “You remember where Maria’s is right? That’s my favorite place to grab coffee.”

He opened the passenger door for me and I dropped my bag down in the floor board before sliding in. Jean leaned in and I flushed at the sudden proximity of his lips to mine. If this bullshit kept up I was going to go insane.

_If you’re not going to kiss me, get out of my bubble_.

I was about to ask for some personal space, but his voice called back my attention. “It’s on the corner by Sina Music Store, right?”

I swallowed and nodded. “Yeah, that’s right.”

“Cool, I remember how to get there.” He flicked my nose and stood back up, closing the door.

.::.

The ride over to Maria’s was spent in comfortable conversation. Jean made me laugh until I was almost crying, though admittedly most of his humor was at Eren’s expense. I couldn’t really complain, he was spot-on at calling him out on his faults, nothing if not blunt. I found that by the time we arrived at Maria’s my face was hot from laughter and I could scarcely breathe thanks to Jean’s quick wit and charming level of crudeness.

Jean and I went inside and I was immediately relaxed by the familiar smell of coffee grounds and aging paper. I took a deep breath, soaking up the comforting scent and looked around. It was nearly deserted today, with only a few other college students lurking in corners with coffee, books, and laptops. One or two people ventured into the aisles of books, and there was little chatter, most of the noise in the building coming from the rickety old fire-hazard of an espresso machine behind the counter. I turned to look at Jean placing his shades atop his head and I smirked, stretching up and stealing them, using them to push my bangs back as I placed them on top of my head.

“What the hell, Arlert?” He pouted, crossing his arms.

I shrugged and looked him in the eye. “I thought they’d look better on me.” I replied, my voice monotone for only a brief moment before broke character and began giggling, to which he rolled his eyes with a grin of his own.

“Well you aren’t wrong, I suppose.”

I spluttered and averted my gazed, cheeks heating up. Well, that backfired.

A throat cleared and I looked over towards the counter where Annie, the barista, was leaning over it, looking slightly amused. She blew her bangs out of her face and called out softly, “You two gonna order something, or keep verbally fucking each other in the doorway?”

My eyes widened and I scoffed, crossing my arms and not even daring to glance at Jean, who hadn’t responded. I stepped up to the counter and narrowed my eyes. “Hello, _Annie_.”

The corner of her lips twitched up in the smallest smile possible and she nodded. “Armin, you gonna have your usual?”

“Yeah, that’d be great, thanks,” I nodded.

Annie looked to Jean next, “And for the rich asshole?”

I saw Jean’s face scrunch up, and I reached out to grab his hand to keep him from doing something to get us kicked out of my home away from home.

“Um, Jean, do you know Annie?”

Jean huffed, squeezing my hand before pulling it away to cross his arms and glare at her. “Yeah, I know her. Her cousin Reiner and I used to play little league on the same team. Practically grew up together. Reiner, his husband, Bert, and this tiny shrew are coming to the party tomorrow night as well.”

I blinked and looked at Annie for confirmation, and she simply shrugged.

“So what’s it gonna be, Jean?” Annie asked again. “I don’t have all day.”

She did, though. This was the least busy day of the week for the shop, and I knew for a fact that as soon as she was done making our drinks she’d be playing with her phone. That was just Annie for you.

Jean ordered and paid for both of our drinks and I went to sit at my usual table in the far corner, relaxing into the plush chair. I watched from my seat as Jean waited for our drinks, trading banter with Annie. I was suddenly hit with the overwhelming answer to my earlier question.

This was definitely a date.

I mean, Jean had been pretty obvious with his flirting. He had even called me attractive.

The realization didn’t shock me as much I imagined it would. It wasn’t like I was opposed. He was definitely no Eren Jaeger, but Jean was handsome and funny and he seemed to be into me. So what the hell, I might as well enjoy myself. It wasn’t often that I was asked out on dates, and by that I mean it hadn’t happened since middle school, when Thomas had accidentally asked me out to the Valentine’s Day dance thinking I was Historia Reiss. That was an interesting night.

I felt my phone vibrate and fished it out of the pocket of my jeans.

One unread message.

_From: Eren J- If u need to be rescued send me a smoke signal n I’ll come rip his liver out for u._

I snickered and rolled my eyes, setting my phone to the side as Jean came back with our drinks. He sat across from me, carefully placing our coffees on the table and propping his chin up on his hand.

“So, how was class?” He asked.

I snorted, leaning in. “Honestly? Kinda boring. I’m nearing the end of my degree program and I’m finally feeling the burnout. It’s my last semester, actually.”

Jean tilted his head, bringing his coffee up to his lips. “What are you going to do after?”

I took a sip of my own overly sweet beverage before responding. “Mikasa, Eren, and I are going to be getting an apartment together, down at the shore. Or, that’s what we’re hoping for.”

I must not have seemed very hopeful because Jean’s eyebrow shot up. “Oh? Is that not what you want?”

I sighed and sat back. “I want it more than anything, Jean. There’s nowhere I’d rather be than at the ocean.”

“Then what has you so glum? You look like someone’s about to drop dead.”

I avert my gaze and twirl a lock of hair around my finger. “I feel like if I leave something bad is going to happen to my Gramps and my parents...” I shook my head. “I’m sorry, that probably sounds stupid.”

Jean’s hand covered the free one I had available on the tabletop and I looked up to see him staring at me with a deeply troubled expression. “Hey, that’s not stupid. It’s normal to be worried about the important people in your life.”

I bit my lip and nodded. “I guess, but Eren thinks I’m overreacting. He says I should just do what I want and not worry about the repercussions.”

Jean’s fingers curled around mine and his thumb stroked my knuckles as he leaned forward. “Eren can be a hotheaded asshole, but he cares about your happiness. As much as I hate to admit it, he’s not entirely wrong. You can’t live your life for your family. But it is important to remember that you can’t live your life just for Eren either. Do what you want. Do what makes you comfortable.”

Funny, I hadn’t expected Jean to be that insightful. Eren would probably be stunned to silence.

I took a deep breath and nodded, averting my eyes from his intense gaze to our intertwined fingers. “I… Um, thank you, Jean. I’ll keep that in mind.” I looked up from under my lashes and shot him a soft smile.

He smiled back. “Anytime, Blondie.”

He reached for his coffee before noticing my phone and smirking, taking it from me and trying to unlock the device. I watched in amusement as he locked himself out and grew frustrated. I put my hand out and wiggled my fingers for it and he sighed, placing it back into my palm.

“Why do you need my phone?” I asked, waiting the allotted twenty seconds before I could unlock my phone again and hand it over.

  
“Gonna give you my number so you can bug me when you’re not busy being the Popcorn Princess,” he grinned, and I grew flustered.

“Popcorn _Manager,”_ I stated, crossing my arms and scowling as he simply continued to type away at my phone, his smirk altogether too infuriating and charming at once.

I had a nasty impulse to purge it from his face. Whether by a smack or my own lips, well, that was a tossup really.

After a few minutes, Jean handed me my phone with a satisfied smirk that I really, _really_ didn’t trust. I eyed him warily before looking down to see his contact entry. His name, Jean Kirschtein, with a little heart emoji next to it. The corner of my lips twitched up,

“A heart? Really, Jean? Aren’t you being a bit forward?”

He simply shrugged, carding his fingers through his hair. “Maybe, but if you didn’t like it you wouldn’t be here, am I right? You would have already sent Jaeger a smoke flare.”

I spluttered, scowling at the fact that he had read my messages. I shot him a final look before scrolling through my contacts.

He’d changed all of my friend’s names. The list now included:

Freckled Marc antOny

Hot Momkasa

Bottomless Stomach Braus

Nose, Queen of the Fjord

Meena Meena Bo Beena

Thom and Jerry

And finally,

Ewren Lameger.

I snorted and arched a brow. “Truly you are a most mature and clever man, Jean. This says it all.”

He grinned and shot me a wink. “I try.”

I shook my head before shooting him a text.

_To: Jean Kirschtein <3- I give you permission to add a heart next to my name in your contacts._

Jean’s phone buzzed and he looked at it, his lips stretching into a smirk as he arched his brow at me.

I feigned innocence and tilted my head. “What? Just making sure you have my number so you can bother me when Marco is too fed up to deal with you.”

Jean let out a chuckle and took another gulp of his coffee. “Marco is always too fed up to deal with me, but he sticks around anyway.”

I gave a small smile, relaxing back in to my chair and taking small sips of my coffee. This was nice. This was… familiar.

After a few minutes of comfortable silence Jean spoke up again. “You know, it’s kind of weird being back here after all that time in France.”

I took his sunglasses off my head and attempted to fix my bangs. “Oh? What’s so weird about it?”

He sat back in his chair and crossed his legs, staring up at the ceiling as if the answer was pasted there to be read from.

“It’s… complicated. I don’t know if this sounds strange or not, but ever since I got back, I’ve been having the strangest sense of Déjà vu. Especially when I’m around old friends. It’s a little hard to explain.”

I squinted, leaning in and leveling him with a wary gaze. “Do you… ever have weird dreams, Jean? Nightmares? About our friends?”

His gaze flickered to me, and it seemed like he was searching for something before he let out a breathless, “ _Yes._ ”

I slowly nodded and licked my lips. “Me too.”

Nothing else was said about it, but something strange had obviously come to pass between us. A shift in mood. I could feel static in the air between us, crackling and intense. I don’t know how long we’d been staring at each other when I finally decided to do something. I don’t know what possessed me to lean over and grab his coffee to drink it, but it certainly did… whatever the hell I was set about to do with the moment.

Jean’s face spread into a flirtatious grin and he leaned forward again as I licked the foam off my lips.

“You know, if you wanted to know what it tasted like you could have just asked, or kissed me to find out.”

I felt heat rise in my cheeks, but I kept my eyes on his as I replied with a haughty, “If you wanted to kiss me so badly, _you_ should have just asked.”

“Maybe I will.”

“Maybe I’ll say yes.”

“Then what have I got to lose?”

“We’ll find out, won’t we?”

We stared intently at each other with smug grins that rapidly dissolved into fits of laughter. It wasn’t until we’d managed to control most of our giggles that Jean leaned over the table and cupped the side of my face, staring between my eyes and lips in that awfully cliché way authors talk about in their cheesy romantic novels.

“So?” He breathed against my lips and I swallowed thickly.

“Maybe,” I whispered back with a smirk before leaning in the rest of the way and tilting my head just so.

The first press of our lips was tentative, chaste and curious. The second was deeper, invasive, wet. And the third was hot, explorative, demanding. It was wonderful, until Jean’s elbow hit my coffee and it splattered all over the carpeted flooring- and me.

Jean jumped back and cursed, and I could hear Annie groaning about having to clean it up while she made no efforts to do so. Jean jumped up and grabbed some napkins, using them to dry off my shirt while I simply sat there, snickering as if someone had told me the funniest joke in the world, my lips swollen and my chest fluttering. My favorite white cardigan was ruined but I couldn’t be bothered about it, especially when Jean offered me the use of the jacket he had in the back seat of his car.

.::.

We finally arrived at my house after proceeding to scrub the carpet for Annie. She said it was the least we could do to make up for her having to watch us try to eat each other’s faces off. It was fair enough, and I wasn’t complaining when I got to view Jean on his hands and knees with his ass in the air on the floor.

Jean turned the car off and I picked at the zipper on his Spiderman hoodie, my own coffee-covered cardigan crumpled and shoved into my bag. I hesitated before looking over and offering Jean a small smile. “I’ll wash this and give it back to you.”

He shook his head, pushing his hand through his hair in that obnoxiously attractive way he seemed to do _everything._ “Nah, you keep it for a while. Look’s good on you. Wear it to my party tomorrow?”

I chuckled. “Alright, I think I can do that… This was fun Jean. I’ll text you later?”

He smirked and leaned in, nudging my nose with his own. “Not if I text you first,” he said before kissing me and pulling the door lock up.

I suppressed a snort at his antics while I kissed him back, savoring the flavor of coffee on his mouth. It tasted better on him than it did in the cup.

Our lips smacked together noisily until my lungs decided to intervene, and I pulled back for air. I grinned and pecked his cheek before grabbing my bag and leaving him there. When I got to the door I turned and waved at him, watching as he wiggled his fingers before starting the Jag and pulling out of my driveway.


	4. In Which Armin is Done with Eren's Shit 100%

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hello lovelies! Just a warning, the beginning of this chapter features a heavy makeout and the end scene features smut so if that icks you, feel free to skip them as they aren't really too important to the plot. Xx

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time for sinning ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Hot, melty kisses and wandering hands. The smell of hay and manure. Eren was radiating heat from above me, and we were both sweating through our uniforms. His cropped jacket had been discarded long ago, and my fingers itched to get his shirt off as well, but he wouldn’t let up from marking my neck long enough for me to pull it over his head. I heard noises, guttural and low, and much different than the snorts and whinnies from the horses in the stalls around us, and realized they must have been coming from me. I throw a leg over his hips and grind up shamelessly, but it’s worth my dignity to hear him grunt like that. He suddenly stops moving and covers my mouth, leaning forward to whisper something in my ear about hearing noises outside. I feel immense anxiety at the possibility of being caught, but there is no resolution.

.::.

I wake up, and the first thought in my head is _Sweet Jesus._

The second thought is about the rather embarrassing after effects of my dream. I quickly take a cold shower and return to bed, and after thoroughly calming down, I picked up my phone. The last message I had was a good night text from Jean. I smile a little at the screen before sighing and letting my phone fall against my chest.

Jean was sweet. Jean was handsome and funny. Jean was blunt and painfully honest. He was honestly a great catch, and I felt incredibly lucky that he’d taken an interest in me. However no matter what I seemed to feel for Jean, Eren was still stuck in the back of my head. 

I sighed and turned over, unlocking my phone again and shooting Jean a text. It was about six in the morning, maybe he’d be awake. I’d fallen back asleep when about twenty minutes later the ping of the text notification stirred me. I rubbed the blurriness from my eyes to read it.

Jean Kirschtein <3: _morning sunshine why up so early?_

I yawned, typing out a response.

To: Jean Kirschtein <3: _Well the sun is supposed to be up first right? What are you doing up?_

To my surprise I received a picture of a shirtless Jean leaning against what seemed to be a balcony railing, but I really couldn’t tell because of the angle. I swallowed thickly as my eyes were drawn in by the light hitting Jean’s neck, collarbone, and broad shoulders just right. His hair was messy and his eyes, though bruised underneath by the tell-tale signs of sleep deprivation, were lidded and sultry. And, of course, there was a lazy smirk on his face. Stupid attractive asshole. I might have been salivating just a little bit. 

The caption read: 

_I like watching u rise to the occasion Mr. Sunshine_

I snorted at the positively awful joke before taking a picture of myself, _trying_ to be a fourth as alluring as he was. Under the picture I wrote:

_You’re jokes are terrible. You’re lucky I think you’re cute._

I finally sighed and got out of bed, stretching and padding down stairs, phone in hand. I received my reply as I was starting to chomp down on a bowl of cereal.

Jean Kirschtein <3: _You make bedhead look like Fashion Week in Paris_

I honestly didn’t know what to say to that. It was clear he was trying to be sweet, but I’d seen this year’s Fashion Week rundown, and… well… Fashion hair wasn’t really practical or conventionally beautiful. I slurped down some milk from the bowl before typing out a reply.

To: Jean Kirschtein <3: _Thanks I think. I’ll let you go now, I’m gonna get some work done on a paper before getting ready for your party tonight. It’s at 8 right? Might be a little late, Mika doesn’t get off till then._

I sat my spoon down in my bowl just as my mother came into the kitchen. “Up already, dear? You don’t have class today, I thought you’d be sleeping in.”

I smiled and offered my cheek up to her for a peck. “I guess my body decided it was time to get up.”

Her face pinched up as she examined my own, no doubt assessing the rings around my eyes. “You don’t get enough rest dear, and I’m worried about you. You work and study too hard.”

I sighed, turning away from her concerned gaze. “I’m alright, I’m off today and I’m going to be studying a bit before going out with Eren and Mikasa.” I picked up my phone again to read the reply Jean had sent.

Jean Kirschtein <3: _That’s cool, I’ll make sure and hide some food in the kitchen for you so Sash doesn’t get it all. C U L8tr ;)_

Mom’s voice caught my attention again, and I turned to see her kissing my father on the cheek as he grabbed his morning coffee before heading out the door. Gramps hadn’t come down yet. It must be a bad day for him. I sighed and tried to push down my overwhelming feeling of dread as I took my bowl to the sink and headed back up to my room to work.

.::.

“So… You and Jean?”

Mikasa was laying across my bed, scrolling through the feed on her phone as I prattled around the room in my boxer briefs, tossing clothes this way and that, trying to find something to wear. It was after eight. Mikasa had gotten here a little while ago and we were both waiting for Eren to pick us up.

“Me and Jean _what_?” I felt my cheeks heat up as I finally found my favorite pair of black skinny jeans, the ones that made my ass look good, according to Eren.

“Eren called me in a fit yesterday because you went on a coffee date? So what’s all that about?”

I looked over at Jean’s red and blue Spiderman jacket and sighed, choosing a plain white shirt before going over to obsessively brush my hair for what must have been the tenth time.

“What’s what about? We’re… dating. I guess.” I heard her sit up and sigh and I turned to shoot her a look.

“What?”

“You guess?”

“Well yeah, I mean… we went on a date and have hearts by each other’s names in our contacts, and he let me borrow his jacket, and we kissed so-”

“Are you really doing this because you want to, or are you trying to make Eren jealous?” Mikasa attempted to tug at something around her neck as if to pull it up over her chin before crossing her arms over her chest.

I frowned. “Mikasa, I really like Jean, and _unlike Eren,_ Jean likes me back. Is it wrong to try and pursue a road without a dead end for once?”

I turned back to my mirror and brushed my hair behind my ears before dabbing some of Mikasa’s concealer under my eyes and setting it with powder. When I walked back over to my desk chair to grab the jacket slung over it I caught Mikasa’s silently judging gaze. 

“If you have something to say, go ahead.”

She was quiet another moment, her dark blue eyes swirling with something akin to pity. I didn’t like it very much.

“I just don’t understand why you see Eren as a dead end.”

I scoffed and was about to retort when someone outside laid on the horn. I sighed and quickly slipped on the jacket and my shoes. “Come on, that’s gotta be him.”

.::.

The car ride over to Jean’s was filled with me giving Eren directions that I looked up on my phone from the back seat. Every once in a while Mikasa would say something, but other than that, Eren wouldn’t shut up about how much he was going to drink. I sighed.

Eren was an overly affectionate drunk, as I quickly found out during our freshman year of college. We’d gone to a party our first weekend in and Eren had furiously made out with nearly everyone in the room, including myself. That was dream fuel for a while. I myself didn’t drink much, mostly because I was so petite that it didn’t take much to get me drunk in the first place. Mikasa never drank, which is why she always ended up with Eren’s keys for safe keeping.

We pulled up in front of a rather impressive house on the rich side of town where quite a few cars were already aligned against the curb. I could hear the pounding of the bass as we walked up to the door. Eren hit the doorbell button about fifty-six times before it opened, revealing not Jean, but a rather intimidating blonde with enough muscle to rival a professional wrestler. He seemed familiar, but I couldn’t pinpoint why. Mikasa, surprisingly enough, was the one to jog my memory.

“Reiner. Is Annie here?”

“Hey guys. Yeah ‘Kasa, Annie’s in the kitchen with Bert. You guys come on in, Jean’s around here somewhere.”

I glanced at Eren to find him quirking a brow, he seemed deep in thought. I punched him lightly to get his attention before dragging him through the doorway. Mikasa went off to the kitchen while Eren and I followed after Reiner, Annie’s cousin as I now recalled, and ended up in the living room. The lights were low, but the music was loud and all around there were people dancing or drinking. I saw Sasha and her boyfriend Connie doing body shots in the corner. Historia and Ymir were snuggled up together on the floor by the couch where Marco and Jean were sitting, deep in conversation with a few other people. 

Reiner grabbed a beer off the end table. “Hey Jeanbo, Jaeger and that cute friend of his are here,” he said, plopping himself down in the recliner. His husband Bertholdt, a tall bean pole of a man, walked in and leaned over him to steal a kiss.

I saw Jean turn to me and grin, standing up and making his way over. He pulled me into a tight hug and I flushed as he kissed my cheek. “I’m glad you could make it, Blondie. My jacket looks really good on you.” 

Before I could say anything in return there was a sharp clearing of a throat, and I turned to look at a rather annoyed looking Eren.

“Jaeger.”

“Kirschtneigh.”

I sighed. _Here we go._ Damn, I’d forgotten the first aid kit.

Jean sighed and crossed his arms. “Are we really already going to the horse jokes, Jaeger? Are you still five?”

“Fix your face and I’ll think of some new insults.”

The crowd didn’t really seem to notice what was happening other than those of us around the couch, who were _very_ interested. I overheard Ymir start a betting pool.

They stared each other down for a few minutes before Jean clicked his tongue and shook his head, slipping an arm around my waist and pulling me close to his side. “You’re lucky you’re friends with my _boyfriend_ , Jaeger, or I’d already have tossed your ass in the pool.”

My face heated up at the title I was given, and I saw Eren’s face morph from one emotion to several others within a very quick expanse of time before he grumbled and turned to march into what I assumed to be the kitchen. Ymir cursed as all bets were now off.

I frowned, catching myself from going after him. Eren would be fine, Mikasa would set him straight. I looked up at Jean. “I’m sorry about him.”

Jean shrugged, pulling me over to the couch. “Honestly I’m used to it. He’s just an angry piece of shit.”

I frowned, sitting between Marco and Jean. “Yeah, I suppose. Hi Marco.”

Marco shot me a sweet smile and simply turned up his beer, waving at me with his fingers. Jean picked up a can of Coke from the table and took a swallow. 

“You’re not drinking? At your own party?” I asked, arching a brow.

Before Jean could reply, Marco chimed in. “Jean doesn’t drink anything except champagne, and that’s only at the big fancy dinners his parents make him go to.”

I nodded, looking back at Jean. “Fair enough. I don’t drink much myself. Next to no tolerance, I’m afraid.”

Jean gave me a sympathetic smile, throwing his arm around my shoulders. “That’s alright, there’s plenty of soda and I have that food stashed away for you if you get hungry. I don’t think Sasha’s found it yet, anyway…” 

I chuckled, leaning against his side and stealing his coke from him, much like I did with his coffee yesterday. “Don’t mind if I do.” I smirked up at him and he snorted, shaking his head. I took a swig and looked around the room as Jean and Marco chattered around me.

Jean’s living room was honestly about the size of the entire first floor of my house. The lights were low, but it was still fairly easy to see everyone. There weren’t nearly as many people here as a traditional college party would have, and I found that I recognized most, if not all of the attendees from somewhere or another.

The song changed and I jumped when Jean leaned in to whisper in my ear, “Wanna dance Blondie?”

I hesitated. Dancing really wasn’t my thing. I had about as much rhythm as a monkey tripping on acid.

“I’m not really cut out for dancing, Jean.”

He frowned. “Oh come on, I’m not exactly the best at cutting a rug either, but it’s fun. Come on, dance with me.”

I sighed and nodded, letting him pull me up and closer to the dancing crowd. I stood stiffly, trying to figure out how to move my body, when he pulled my arms up around his neck. His hands slid slowly down my shoulders and sides and settled on my hips as he began to sway to the tempo. I started moving in turn, biting my lip. I glanced up at him and pouted.

“Jean I feel ridiculous.”

He chuckled, gripping my hips a bit tighter. “Don’t worry, we both probably look ridiculous.”

I snorted in indignation and averted my gaze. “Very reassuring, Mr. Kirschtein.”

Jean snickered and pulled me close against him, our bodies grinding together in what must have looked like a mass of awkward squirming. The longer we danced like that, the less I felt self-conscious, and the more I began to appreciate the press of his body against mine. Jean was tall and solid, though not as broad as Eren was, and he smelled like that godawful, tacky Chocolate Axe that was somehow still very appealing on him. I chanced a look up into his pretty hazel eyes and found that he only had eyes for me, a smirk in place on his lips. I couldn’t seem to look away from his sultry gaze, our bodies moving in tandem to some subpar hip-hop track. At some point Jean’s hands slid around to cup my ass and I shivered, pulling him down for a kiss.

And then, just as if there was a giant record scratch, everything went to hell.

I could hear Eren yelling over the music and Mikasa just barely as well. I jumped apart from Jean as if I’d been caught doing something illegal and watched Eren storm out of the kitchen, Mikasa hot on his heels and Annie trailing behind her.

“Eren, you’re being absolutely ridiculous, even for you. Why do you have such a problem with me dating Annie?”

I blinked in confusion. I hadn’t known Annie and Mikasa were a thing. 

Mikasa looked positively livid, which was truly terrifying considering her face was usually as blank as Eren’s calculus homework. Annie was clearly pissed off as well, but she remained quiet.

I stepped up to them. “What’s going on?”

“Eren’s being an asshole because he doesn’t like my girlfriend.”

“I have a right to be an asshole when my friends are dating shady fucknuts!” Eren’s eyes flashed and his jaw clenched.

I took a step towards him. “Look, Eren, just because you don’t like-”

“Don’t start with me, Armin. First it was you with that rich asshole and now Mika and that bitch from the bookstore. You both could do so much better but you choose to fuck around with the-”

**_SMACK_ **

****

My hand stung and my heart immediately felt ten times heavier, but damn did he deserve that. The music kept playing, but there was no more chatter around us. Everyone had stopped to stare and I immediately felt self-conscious, but I swallowed my nerves and pulled my hand to my chest.

“Eren you have no right to dictate who Mikasa and I can date. We’re not kids anymore and we…” I struggled for a moment to find the words, but felt Jean’s reassuring hand find my shoulder. “We don’t need your protection.”

I must have struck a chord with Eren because I saw humility flash over his features before his gaze hardened again.

“Mikasa, give me my keys.”

“No. You’ve already had three beers.”

“Mikasa, give me my fucking keys.” He got up in her face, and I saw Annie’s fists flex.

“Not a chance.”

Eren growled and head-butted her before stalking through the crowd and out the door.

“Fine, I’ll fucking walk!”

When he was finally gone, the chatter in the room picked up again and I shared a meaningful look with Mikasa before Annie grabbed her hand and pulled her back to the kitchen, no doubt to get some ice for her head.

I stood there staring at the floor, and my eyes began to water. I wiped my face on the sleeve of Jean’s jacket and willed my body to stop shaking as Jean pulled me into an embrace.

“Hey… do you want to get away from the party for a while?”

I nodded and he ushered me out to the hallway and up the stairs.

.::.

Jean’s room was spacious but filled with things. Videos games and consoles mostly, and I knew that on a better day I’d be taking advantage of it. For now, though, I sat on his queen sized bed as he silently sat next to me, stroking his thumb over my knuckles as he held my hand.

I sniffled a bit before speaking up. “I’m sorry, Jean. We ruined your party...”

“Hey shush, none of that. Eren was being an asshole, that isn’t your fault. He’s not your responsibility.” He nudged my side with his elbow. “He was asking for that smack and I’m proud of you for standing up for yourself.”

I flushed despite myself and shook my head. “I feel awful though… Eren’s my best friend, and I know he means well, but…”

“He’s a terribly misguided idiot is what he is.” Jean said bluntly, laying back on the bed and propping his arms behind his head.

“As usual, you seem to be spot on.” I sighed, hesitating before laying down next to him, my head on his chest.

“I call it like I see it.” The fingers of one of his hands began playing with my hair, and I couldn’t help but close my eyes and hum. Jean’s presence was reassuring.

“He’s jealous.”

That caught me off guard. I opened my eyes and shot Jean a look.

“Jealous of what exactly?”

“Well…” Jean shifted and turned over, hovering over me and caging me in with his forearms. “If you were dating him instead of me, I’d be jealous too. You picked me, not him. He felt betrayed, and ‘Kasa being with Annie- I don't know what that shit is about- it was just a tipping point.”

I frowned. “I don’t think so. I mean, I’m nothing special.”

Jean arched a brow, leaning in so his breath ghosted on my lips. “Armin, you have no idea how gorgeous you are, do you?”

I swallowed thickly as his lips skimmed over my jaw.

“Or how sweet and good and clever you are?” His teeth grazed my Adam’s apple.

“You didn’t see how everyone was watching you while we danced, did you?” One of his hands slid down my side and groped my thigh.

I gasped and shook my head. “You sure they were staring at _me?”_

I felt him grin against my throat. “I _know_ they were staring at you.”

I flushed and yanked him up by the hair for a messy kiss, all tongue and teeth and obscene noises. That strange, electric buzz was in the air again. The wet smacking of lips drowned out most of my thought process and my body was rapidly overheating. I pushed Jean back a bit, shoving his jacket off of my shoulders before grabbing him and pulling him back on top of me, between my thighs. My frantic hands smoothed down his shoulders and back as his own dove under my shirt to chart out the expanse of my soft but flat stomach. My back arched as his fingers found my nipples, my hips bucking just slightly. Thoughts of how we danced together, clumsy and too close, flooded my senses with arousal again, and a low moan seeped from my mouth as Jean pushed up my shirt and latched onto my chest with his lips and teeth.

I threw my legs over his hips and ground upwards, our hips slotted together for perfectly agonizing friction. My hands dove under his shirt for my turn to feel him up. He was much thinner and less chiseled than Eren, but he was still thick and warm against the pads of my fingers.

Eren.

_Shit._

The dream from last night flashed in front of my vision and only excited me further. I imagined Eren’s mouth on me as Jean left marks across my chest. I imagined Eren’s hands on my dick as Jean released both our straining erections with deft fingers. My eyes rolled back as Eren- no, _Jean,_ stroked our cocks in tandem, sliding them against each other in his fist. I rutted into his hand wantonly, squirming and scratching up his shoulders as I held on for dear life.

Jean’s grunts and moans got louder, and he cursed into my mouth as he kissed me again. He twisted his wrist just right, and I threw my head back to cry out at the ceiling. I kept hold of the sheets with one hand and brought my hand up between us to stroke my thumb against the tip of his cock where precum was spilling from. The knots in my stomach were winding tighter and tighter, and I could tell Jean was close too, his hips bucking against mine frantically.

I opened my eyes and for a moment there were green eyes instead of hazel. The pleasure built and built, and my only thought was _Don't say Eren_.

_Don't say Eren._

“Ahhhh! Fuck, _Jean!_ ”

_Oh thank God._

My hips jerked wildly as I released over our hands and stomachs, Jean not much further behind. I watched him bite his lip to muffle his moans as my vision slowly returned to normal.

Jean sat up slowly as our breathing evened out. He pulled his shirt over his head and kicked off his pants, going into his bathroom without another word. I managed to kick off the rest of my clothes, my eyes wandering over Jean’s body as he returned. He brought with him a cloth and gently cleaned me up.

I reached for Jeans crumpled blanket and wrapped it around myself, swallowing thickly before speaking up.

“Jean? Is it alright if I spend the night here?”

Jean’s presence was comforting, and honestly I didn't feel like bugging Mikasa to stay at her place tonight. She and Annie would probably leave together anyway.

“Yeah, of course. You think I'd kick you out after that?” 

I frowned and shook my head. He brushed my bangs back from my face and kissed my nose before grabbing a pair of sweat pants and sliding on a hoodie.

“I'm going to go down and tell Marco to wind the party down and make sure everyone gets home safe. I'll tell Mikasa you're staying alright? Do you want me to bring up that food for you?”

I smiled softly and nodded, my eyes feeling rather heavy. “Yeah, that would be nice, Jean.”

He winked at me and headed down stairs.

I was asleep before he made it back up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Damn, Eren.  
> Don't worry, he shall redeem himself I promise.


	5. In Which Armin and Jean Have Much to Talk About

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> its been like six months lmao rip

I was woken from the most pleasant slumber of my life by a streak of golden sunlight hitting me directly in the face. I slowly blinked my eyes open and glared at the open balcony curtains. Jean must have forgotten to close them the night before.

I turned in my warm cocoon of blankets to the figure sleeping next to me. Jean was sprawled on his stomach, blankets kicked off to expose his bare back and sweatpant clad legs. I smiled fondly at the back of his head and leaned in to kiss his shoulder before getting up and finding my phone in my pants pocket. I shot Eren a text to check on him before going to the bathroom.

When I returned I realized how cold it was and danced from foot to foot as I searched through Jean’s drawers for something to clothe myself in. I found an old band t-shirt, faded and worn soft, and slightly stretched out. I slipped it over my head and adjusted it in front of Jean’s full length mirror. It went barely past my upper thighs and slid off a shoulder, and I was just thinking that it looked a bit too provocative when a wolf whistle sounded behind me. I blushed, whipping around quickly to find a sleepy looking Jean smirking at me, head propped up on his hand.

“Good morning,” I said, trying not to fidget on the spot.

“It’s a great morning.” He gave me another once-over before grinning and patting the bed, “Come on, I don’t want to get up yet.”

I rolled my eyes but obliged, crawling back into bed and pulling the covers back up around us. Jean settled back against the pillows and I laid my head on his chest. We stayed like this for a while, Jean’s hand threading through my hair and untangling my bedhead with gentle fingers as I listened to his heart beat. Jean’s breath stuttered before he finally croaked out a realization.

“I didn’t have a nightmare last night…”

I peered up into his face before quickly looking away and racking my brain for the usually ultra-vivid memories I was accustomed to waking up with.

“I… didn’t either. Strange.”

He made a noise of agreement, sitting up and stretching. “Well, I better go down and check the damage.”

I shuffled out of bed and stretched. “I’ll help you clean up.”

“Okay, but let’s get you some pants or something. I don’t want to have to fuck someone up for gawking at your ass every time you bend over if there are any stragglers.”

I flushed and nodded, tugging down the hem of the shirt as Jean got up and pulled on his own before rifling through and throwing me a pair of basketball shorts. With body parts sufficiently covered, we made our way down the stairs and into the living room.

“Holy shit, it’s actually clean… Marco must have-” Jean cut himself off as I followed him around the couch, covering my mouth to hold back a snicker. Poor Marco was splayed on the couch, one arm and leg hanging off the edge. He snored heavily, drool pooling at the corner of his mouth. Jean shook his head and gave a soft smile before taking my hand and pulling me into the kitchen silently.

He let go of me and went to turn on the coffee pot. I walked over to the island and sat on a stool. “Got anything to eat left? I’m starving.”

“I have stuff to make pancakes,” He called over his shoulder. “You wanna help?”

I nodded and sidled up to him. “I’ll crack the eggs if you mix the dry ingredients.” He smirked and nudged me before going to grab the ingredients.

Cooking with Jean was honestly the most messy and hilarious experience of my life. We wound up getting most of the batter on ourselves and laughing so hard about it that it wasn’t long before Marco wandered in with sleepy eyes. He arched a brow and motioned to the mess adorning our clothes. “Um, is there any batter left in the bowl?”

I peered down into the bowl and back up at him sheepishly. “Um… No?”

Jean snorted, running his dirty hands through his hair. Marco simply sighed and shook his head. “How about you two go clean up and _I’ll_ make breakfast.”

He didn’t leave much room for argument, and I wouldn’t have anyway. The batter drying on my skin was starting to itch. Jean agreed, slapping Marco on the back and laughing as he was scolded for ruining Marco’s shirt. I rolled my eyes and made my way upstairs, Jean trailing behind me.

.::.

Jean insisted that his shower was large enough for several people and I shrugged, following him in to it. I admit I was fully expecting Jean to take advantage of our mutual wet nakedness, but the most he did was kiss me before turning away to scrub his hair.

After we were both clean and dry, Jean offered me some clothing and we made our way back down stairs where Marco was stacking pancakes on to three plates. I thanked Marco quietly before sitting on a barstool at the counter with my food.

“Thanks for cleaning up, Marco, you didn’t need to do that,” Jean said, leaning against the counter and digging in to his own share of heavenly fluff cakes.

Marco shook his head. “It was a disaster area, I couldn’t leave it in good conscience. I’m afraid I couldn’t save your carpet from the results of Connie and Reiner’s chugging contest, though. They both threw up.”

“It’s cool, I’ll just move the couch over the stain.”

I scrunched up my nose and shared a look with Marco. He sighed and shook his head. When we’d finished up, Jean and I took over the dishes and Marco gathered up his things to get ready to leave.

“Well, I’m going to get ready for work. What are you doing for the rest of the day, Jean?”

“Well, I was thinking about taking Blondie up to the treehouse.”

I saw Marco’s face drop and I turned to Jean. “Treehouse?”

Jean nodded enthusiastically. “Yeah, you know the huge forest at the edge of town? Marco and I used to play there all the time as kids. When we were like twelve we built a treehouse there. Like a secret base.”

“Oh, that sounds cool.” Out of the corner of my eye I saw Marco’s shoulders slump.

“I’m… heading out. You guys have a good time.”

“Bye, Marco.” Jean seemed not to notice anything different, but Marco’s demeanor was so off-putting that I couldn’t stop thinking about it even as we made our way up to the north end of the city in the Jag. We hiked along the worn uphill path, bantering back and forth for about ten minutes until Jean grabbed my hand, pulling me off into the deeper woods.

“Come on, run with me,” he laughed, stringing me along as he broke into a sprint. I laughed along, despite the muscles in my calves screaming and the stitch in my side growing unbearable. Perhaps I really should have started going to the gym with Eren and Mikasa when they’d offered to take me along.

After what seemed like hours, Jean slowed to a stop and I let go of his hand to double over and catch my breath. “Well, this is it. It doesn’t look like much, but I promise it’s sturdy.”

I looked up, wiping the sweat from my forehead. For two preteen boys to have constructed it, the treehouse was fairly impressive. It was a simple, four-walled mass of stray boards and planks with square holes cut holes into each side for windows. I was surprised to find that it even had a roof.

I walked up to the rickety, half-rotten ladder and glanced back over my shoulder at Jean. “Are you sure this is safe?”

“Yeah, I was here the other day. It’s still holding up fine.”

I sighed and rubbed my sweaty palms off on my jeans before starting to climb up. The inside of Jean and Marco’s treehouse was filled to the brim with things. The walls were covered in outdated posters and silly drawings, and stacks of comic books and porn magazines were shoved into corners. Here and there were board games and half built Lego sets, and even a set of dusty walkie-talkies. I pulled myself up into the middle of the room and admired everything as Jean came up behind me.

“Welcome to the SS Kirschbodt,” he grinned, flopping into a pile of blankets and sending up a cloud of dust.

I settled across from him, looking around the walls at the drawings that were obviously older than even the treehouse itself. There was one of colorful stick figures holding hands with big ugly lettering that said “To JON from MARCO age 7” and “BEST FRIENDS FOREVER.

I remembered Marco’s hurt face from that morning, and suddenly I felt like I was intruding upon sacred ground.

“You okay? The dust isn’t bothering you is it?”

I looked back at Jean and arched a brow. “Should it be?”

“No? I don’t know, you seem like the type of person who would have allergies.”

I wrinkled my nose and shook my head. I got up and sauntered over to the window, peering out at the seemingly endless rows of huge trees and was suddenly reminded that we weren’t even a third of the way up.

I started when Jean was suddenly there next to me, peering out. “I wanted to make it higher up, but the branches get weaker as you get closer to the top.”

I nodded in understanding as he continued to speak, his eyes becoming distant and his voice gaining a reverent tone. “Something about this place always held a certain familiarity for me. Not for Marco though, he never got the same weird chills I did when we climbed the trees as far up as we could. I always felt as if I’d been here before. It feels like home. It feels like death.”

I turned to look at him in profile, his amber eyes still cast out the window as if he was watching a movie play.

“There’s a bunch of places that give me that weird feeling, but this forest always hits me hardest. I found it by chance. Well, not really by chance, I mean everyone knows about it but…” He turned away from the window and sat with his back to the wall. I slid down next to him and leaned against his side.

“When I was little, around six, I began to run away from my nanny. Not because she was mean or anything, she was always sweet to me. She used to slip me caramels when Mom and Dad weren’t looking. No, I was just a curious asshole kid. That’s how I met Marco actually. I snuck out the back door one day and ran from house to house peeking in windows, and finally someone peeked back.” He snorted and shook his head. “After that Marco and I were always running around town, giving our families fits and driving the neighbors crazy.

“I started having the dreams when I was eight. They scared me terribly because they were so… Well, they didn’t seem like dreams at all. They seemed like memories. People I knew, but I didn’t know. Places I’d been to, but never seen. And then, there was this forest.” He closed his eyes and leaned his head back. “I had a dream about riding on a horse with hundreds of other riders around, spread out over a field. There were giants charging at us, smoke flares sent up. Lots of screaming. Always there was screaming. We were heading towards the forest.

“The next day I ran to Marco’s house and told him to go on an adventure with me. He asked where we were going. I told him very honestly that I didn’t know. We hopped on our bikes and I led him here. I don’t know how I knew where to go, I was just following some weird sixth sense kind of thing, and I’ve been coming here ever since. Usually with Marco, sometimes alone. I came here to hide whenever I got in trouble. I came here whenever I had a hot date. I came here when I got dumped. I came here to escape things.”

“Does Marco know about them? About the dreams?”

Jean shook his head. “I stopped telling him about them when we were twelve. He never thought much in to them anyway and...”

“And?” I prompted, sliding my hand into his.

“And I knew that he would think I was nuts when suddenly the people from my dreams were showing up in everyday life. When we started middle school suddenly they were everywhere. It started with just Marco. Then there was Mikasa, Connie, you, and Eren. A lot of Eren.”

I blinked and leaned in. “Did you see it? Did you see Eren turn into-“

  
“A giant? He was so ugly and gross looking Armin you should have seen-”

“I have.”

We looked into each other’s eyes, and the prickling static was back. It seemed like time had stopped, both of us unsure how to continue on after such an admittance. I was the first to break the silence, as I could no longer bear it. I had to be sure. “We flew through the air on a harness system. We carried blades.”

“Sometimes there were wings on our backs. Sometimes there was swords.”

I began to shiver, though I didn’t know why. It wasn’t that cold today. “What color… What color was Mikasa’s scarf?”

Jean seemed to search my eyes for something before responding. “It was red. She never took it off.”

Jean squeezed my hand and I realized he was shivering too.

“This is… This is so strange, Jean. Mikasa is the only person I know who shared these dreams, too.”

“Mikasa does? Armin…” Jean leaned across me, pulling over a dusty paperback volume entitled, _Journey of Souls_ by one Michael Newton.

I looked up at him. “What is this?”

“It’s a book about reincarnation. I have more at home, but I think you should read this.”

“You really think we have past lives? Jean, that’s crazy.”

Jean looked me square in the eye and another chill ripped up my spine. “It’s the only thing that makes sense.”

I found I couldn’t argue.

We sat in silence a while. It felt like something heavy had settled over us. Jean let out an exhale, and I looked up from where my fingers were tracing the letters on the cover of the book.

“Hm?”

“I’m just glad someone else seems to know what it feels like… To see those things. I’m glad that of all people that it’s you.” His usually sharp eyes were soft and a bit tired, his smirk replaced with a genuine smile.

“I’m glad too,” I replied, curling into his side as he put his arm around my shoulders.

“So Jaeger doesn’t remember anything?”

“No… Nothing.”

“That’s probably for the best, from what I’ve seen.”

I nodded, knowing full well what he meant.

I reached into my pocket for my phone and pulled up the message I’d sent Eren that morning. I must have been frowning pretty hard because Jean leaned in to read the screen and subsequently kissed my temple, rubbing my arm in a way that was surely meant to be comforting.

_> Read 12:21 PM_


End file.
